TITLE: Learning To Dance AUTHOR: Tasha EMAIL: tasha@thetruth.de POSTED: December 15, 2001 DISCLAIMER: Yes. I mean, no. Not mine. RATING: PG-13 CATEGORY/KEYWORDS: Post-Ep NIHT II, DSR SPOILER: Up to NIHT II. SUMMARY: After the events of NIHT, Doggett makes sure everything is alright. AUTHOR'S NOTES: Special beta thanks to Cattie. And to Diandra at SHODDS for calling me a "hopeless case". :-) More Notes at the end, please. X – X – X – X – X – X – X – X – X – X – X – X – X Almost guiltily, he glanced up at her window as he drove by. She still had the lights on, he noticed with a small smile. For a moment, he tried to decide whether to stop or keep going. But even before the possible consequences of him stopping by her house had reached his consciousness, the matter was already settled. As always, he kept going. Once again, he had ended up sitting in his truck late at night, driving past her apartment house, making sure she was... okay. He hoped she was okay. Maybe he would realize that he hoped for even more, if he thought about it, but he seldomly did. All he did think about was the promise he had given her when he saw her break apart beside Mulder's body that night in the woods. To this day he had not said it out loud, but as he saw her fall apart that night, he had promised her to keep her safe. He had sworn he'd do everything in his power to keep the pain and loss and sorrow away from her. If it were up to him, Dana Scully would never feel sad again. But he had failed. Chewing on his lower lip, he steered the truck past her house and picked up speed. Dark clouds hung over the city, the foreboding of a heavy rain. He had seen the light in her window. That had to be enough. She was okay. If he could, he would stop here, of course, get out, knock on her door, search for whatever it was he hoped to find in her eyes, and ask her if she was okay. But he couldn't do that, could he. It was bad enough as it was – him sneaking around her street in the middle of the night. She had told him to leave before, hadn't she? She had told him to not come back. True, he had pushed her into a conversation that night that had obviously been painful for her. His insinuations must have brought up the fears hidden deep within her, and the possibility that she had stored away in the back of her mind - that her son wasn't "normal", after all – had suddenly seemed closer than ever. He shouldn't have pushed her like that. He could still kick his own ass for harrassing her with the Super Soldier stuff in her present situation. But not so long ago, she had reminded him that all that mattered was the truth, hadn't she? Even if it hurt. And she'd been right, of course. He stepped on the brakes and brought the juddering truck to a halt. The soft knocking on her door made her raise an eyebrow in a mixture of wonder and worry. Who could that be at this time of night? Certainly not Mulder. Her heart jumped a little at the thought of him standing in the hallway. But it wasn't him, she was sure. She hesitated a second before grabbing the gun that always lay on the little entry table and stepping closer to the door. „Who is it?" she asked, her voice a husky whisper no matter how much strength she willed to put into it. „It's me. John." The familiar rumble of his voice made her eyes drift shut in relief. She lowered the gun back to its place on the small table and opened the door before she realized that the thought of John Doggett visiting her at a quarter to midnight wasn't exactly something to be relieved about. As soon as she saw his eyes, she wanted to close that damned door again. His eyes. She adored his eyes, deep seas of steel, fire and ice, and she was sure that anyone who knew him well enough could read everything about this man in his eyes. She wished she did know him well enough. She could swear that those eyes saw through her at times, straight into her soul. And that was what scared her most – the thought that he knew things about her son she had never wanted anybody, herself included, to know. And the fact that he would see how she felt if she let him. So she always walked away from him when he looked at her as if he knew. Or she told him that she was fine. Or she told him to leave. And till now, he had always done as she had asked. He shifted uneasily as he saw her uncomfortable look. Maybe coming here wasn't a good idea, after all. He steadied his breath, still ragged from taking two steps at a time, and put a hand on the doorframe. "Just wanted to make sure you were alright," he simply stated. The sound of his voice hung in the air between them for a long time after he stopped talking. With a vague smile, she nodded at his words and lowered her head, hiding her face from his eyes, hoping to God that she wouldn't stumble and fall now, together with what little dignity she might have left. She wasn't used to falling. He would catch her if she did, she knew. But she wasn't used to falling. For a man. "I'm… I'm fine. Thanks." He nodded gravely and seemed unsure of what to do next. Maybe that was not the answer he had expected. Maybe that was exactly the answer he had expected, and that was even worse. She was about to ask him to leave when she realized that she wanted him to stay. Down the hall, a door opened. Doggett turned around instinctively and was thrown off guard when Scully took the opportunity to grab him by the arm and pull him softly into her apartment. The surprised look he gave her was mingled with something else she wanted to identify as bliss, but she hesitated doing so until she had closed the door behind them and looked up at him again. No, it wasn't bliss. It was love. He looked at her with the purest, most unconditional love she had ever seen in a man's eyes. For an endless moment, she could only stare back at him and felt her knees grow weak. The silence buzzed in her ears and seemed to become louder with every passing second. Doggett looked at her with a stunning patience as he gave her time to choose the path they both would take from where they now stood. When the faintest smile lit her face and she looked down at the floor, he closed the distance between them with one swift motion. No way back now. He gently placed a hand on her arm and slid the other behind her back. With a soft gasp, Scully raised her head to meet his eyes. As he leaned toward her, the world began to turn. Slowly at first, but faster as she let herself respond to his tender kiss. Time stood still. Or did it actually speed up? As he broke their kiss and stepped back, she found herself sighing a complaint. His eyes sparkled as he smiled at her shyly. She grinned and put her hands on her hips. "Can't even wait until I ask you in, can you?" she asked, her eyes shining happily. "No," he laughed and pulled her into his embrace. Outside, the rain set in. - End - The title refers to the saying, "Loving somebody is like learning to dance. You'll have to take one step at a time". Thanks for reading!